I Want to be Hot Again

She's hot but I'm not

Today, I weigh 205. I'm six feet tall. In March of 2009 when I attended SXSW, I weighed approximately 175 pounds. That achievement was due to a couple solid years diligently following Weight Watchers. It was simple really, Low fat. High fiber. All mapped back to a point system. I didn't really choose to start a weight loss program. It was my wife at the time's doing.

Sometime during 2007, my wife (now former wife), in an effort to get a certain overweight cousin to lose weight, asked all her sisters and their husbands to take a challenge. We all did. We all set our own individual goals. But, it seems, I was the only one who followed through. I lost about 20 pounds in about three months. Just by eating a little differently. I exercised, of course. But because of a bad knee, my exercise was limited to walking. Which was fine. 45 minutes/3 miles a day seemed to do the trick.

The best thing about the exercise is the stamina and energy it gave me throughout the day. No more nodding off in the afternoon or feeling like all I wanted to so was lay on the couch.

Over the past year, I've steadily gained weight. It's been slow. And it's my own fault. I stopped exercising for the most part. Started eating whatever I felt like eating. And generally gotten lazy. The clothes that used to fit me 20 pounds ago no longer do. I have a closet full of t shirts, jeans and sweaters that are useless.

I'm not obese or anything. I've just got a bit of a spare tire and a hint of man boobs. Yes. Man boobs. It's the man boobs that really disgust me. Because there's really no way to hide them. Like an overdeveloped, self conscious teenage girl who's embarrassed to wear a bikini or a tight shirt, I'm embarrassed to wear the kinds of t-shirts I could comfortably fit into just a year ago.

There's a lot of reasons I lost the weight in the first place (marital issues) and a lot of reasons I gained it all back (post-divorce guilt). I'll share some of those reasons with you here but this blog is really my way of shaming myself into losing 20 pounds. You see - and I am certainly not the first person to go this route - if I publicly set a goal to weigh 185 by SXSW and I fail, well then there will be a lot of embarrassment. If, however, I succeed, well, there will be a lot of high five's, hugs from hot women and, perhaps, drinks bought for me.

OK, OK. My reasons for losing weight are more serious than a few hottie hugs and free drinks. I'm doing this because it's the healthy thing to do. The right thing to do. I've been lazy. And now it's time to motivate myself to achieve something meaningful, productive and healthy.